Monday, December 27, 2021
Thursday, September 23, 2021
Ever since my father unexpectedly passed away more than three years back, I keep getting recurring dreams of him. Somewhat a mix between how Prithviraj sees his dead sister in the Malayalam movie Koode and how Sanjay Dutt's character sees the Mahatma in the Hindi movie Lage raho munnabhai, even in these dreams I am semi aware that he is no more. Interestingly I do not want these dreams to go away, as I am truly happy during these dreamy times I get with my father now.
In the dream from yesterday morning, I saw him, and in the semi aware state I tell him, "doesn't matter if you are real or a figment of my imagination, just hold my hand and walk with me, and he does, and I wake up.
Later in the day I was thinking, it will be good if I get to speak to some of his friends who would just speak about him and his goodness ("he did so much for me and I miss him"), rather than some of the relatives who would only speak of him in an appropriating manner ("Oh he was closest to me"). My recent self does not initiate much phone calls, and interestingly today two of his former colleagues called me and spoke to me on the lines I was longing to hear!
There must be ways in which the "real world" as we understand, and the worlds beyond that blend.